A letter to the new mum.

To The New Mum.

Firstly, regardless of whether this is your first baby or your seventh, I want to wish you the BIGGEST congratulations. It doesn’t matter if the birth went to plan or not, natural or caesarean, no drugs or high as a kite; you are absolutely incredible!

I’m not a medical expert by any means and I hate unsolicited parenting advice but I’ve had two children myself so I just thought that I’d share some things that I wish I’d known when I had my first baby.

You don’t need to invite the world and his dog to visit you as soon as you get home. Unless you want that, which is great if you do, but if not YOU CAN SAY NO. You have just been through a huge physical and emotional ordeal and you need time and space to heal and enjoy your newborn bubble. With my second baby, I had no visitors in the first week apart from grandparents and it did me the world of good. Hormones are going crazy, you might be full of stitches, nobody is really sleeping, feeding (however you’re going about it) is being established and siblings are adjusting to a new family dynamic. This isn’t a great time for lots of visitors. I realise this might sound a bit cold and I know people are just excited and mean well but you need to put yourself first and visitors will come when you’re ready. No rush.

The best visitors are the ones who put the kettle on or offer to grab something from the shop for you when they arrive and it’s ok to accept the help! They say it takes a village to raise a baby for a reason. If you are lucky enough to have close friends and family then this is the perfect time to use them. Let them cuddle your baby so you can grab a hot shower or accept the offer of a hot meal. Whatever you need, just don’t feel like you have to manage everything alone.

You have just birthed a human being. You are already Super Woman. You do not need to be running around with the vacuum at 2 days postpartum! REST. REST. REST. It makes me cringe when I think about how I forced my husband to go on a walk with me 3 days after my emergency caesarean. I was constantly trying to prove to everyone that I was fine and that I could do everything. Now I can see that NOBODY was judging me, and if they were, who cares?! I barely left the sofa for two weeks after I had my second baby and it was just what my mind and body needed.

Whilst we’re on the subject of being a superhero, keep on top of your painkillers. They are prescribed for a reason, even if you feel fine, just follow your course.

Hormones are completely wild and it can be a really difficult time. Talk to people you love and trust and things will balance out again soon. Have a cry on your mum or explain to your partner if you’re having a down day. This is all perfectly normal and you don’t have to paint on a big smile and pretend you’re cherishing every second (#blessed). If you feel like you’re suffering from a bit more than the ‘baby blues’ then please tell somebody. Go to your GP or Health Visitor or even just check out the PANDAS Foundation who are a charity supporting people with pre and post natal depression. Just don’t suffer alone.

And finally, enjoy your delicious new baby! Time really does fly. Remember nobody knows your baby and your family like you do so trust your instincts and do whatever feels right. You’ve got this!

Thank you for reading,

Knight Mummy x


Beyond the mother.

When you become a parent, suddenly your whole life revolves around someone else. Babies and young children are completely dependent on you so your days are often just about keeping them alive. Everything you do and every decision you make has to have somebody else’s needs factored in first.

Which is all fine, I mean, you kind of know that when you get the job but I think it’s all too easy to completely lose who you are amongst the chaos.

It can be so difficult to have little control over your body when you’re pregnant. It is miraculous and incredible and such a blessing but that doesn’t mean that it’s also easy. I really struggled physically with sickness and heartburn but also mentally as my body was changing and I was putting weight on. This was even harder with my second pregnancy as I’d worked so hard to lose weight after the first time so seeing myself getting bigger again really upset me.

You spend approximately 40 weeks growing a gorgeous baby and then, obviously, it’s time to get them out. It doesn’t matter how you go about that, I think whatever happens your body is left in a right state afterwards! I had two completely different labours but both times I was left with stitches, bruising, swelling and a sad looking, deflated belly (NOT deflated as in small, you understand. More like a 6 month pregnant belly but saggy. Lovely.)

In the early days you obviously have this new person to get to know and look after whilst healing from the birth and dealing with insane hormone fluctuations. Naturally, you’re probably not putting your heels on or hitting the gym (but fair play if you are!) and nobody would expect you to, you’ve just had a baby! But I think it’s so easy to continue like that until you feel a bit lost.

At some point, whenever it feels right, you need to start finding yourself in that postpartum fog and do things for yourself and not just your children/partner/house/job.

It took until my baby boy was about 9 months old for me to remember myself. I started just by buying a book and actually reading it. I know. Shocking. And it felt great. A few evenings a week I would have a long shower once the kids were in bed, use a face mask and lie in bed with my book. It seems so trivial but it’s almost like it kickstarted me making myself a priority every now and then. That famous saying ‘you can’t pour from an empty cup’ is so true.

When you’re feeling good, you can give your best to your family.

I was still wearing a lot of maternity clothes just because they were comfy and convenient so I packed them all away and forced myself to actually look in my wardrobe and buy things for me when I was shopping. It wasn’t anything expensive, but it felt good to shift some of my focus back onto myself.

I walk at least 40 minutes every day now as my daughter is in nursery but I also like to try and get a couple of workouts in throughout the week. Again, it’s good to focus on myself and look after my body as it’s served me well over the last few years! I also find I’m more positive and patient after a bit of exercise which is always useful when I spend my days refereeing a cruising baby and a threenager.

This is something that is obviously different for everyone, it’s just my personal experience. I’m not writing this to ‘show off’, I just hope it can encourage one mum to ignore the laundry for an hour and have a long bath or buy that bag that you loved but put back on the shelf.

Basically, you’re important too, Mama!

Thanks for reading,

Knight Mummy x

 Another labour story.

Picture the scene. It was Saturday night and I was 2 days overdue and MISERABLE. For the last few weeks I could barely walk with SPD, feeling almost constantly sick and everything gave me heartburn. Mr Knight took the toddler up to bed whilst I grumpily bounced around on my gym ball. And what do you know, hello contractions! They started at about 9:30pm and gathered momentum pretty quickly.

At about 11pm we called my mom who was on stand by for Little Knight and I started using a TENS machine (which I recommend if you’re thinking about it). I managed to stay at home until about 1am when we went to hospital as my contractions were about 2 minutes apart and lasting about 1 minute each.

I was quite apprehensive about going to hospital as last time I was in labour (which you can read about here) I was only 2-3cm dilated when we got there so I really didn’t want that to be the case this time. You can imagine how relieved I was when the midwife said I was 8-9cm!

I went off to a delivery room with a very lovely midwife and got straight on the gas and air! I continued to labour for the next couple of hours and things got very intense! She broke my waters at about 3:30am and I was almost immediately ready to push!

Now that is something I’ll never forget. I completely lost my mind. I may have bitten my husband. It was horrific. But after less than half an hour my baby BURST into the room (facing upwards and causing some SERIOUS damage on the way out!) and placed straight on my chest.

I just lay there in complete shock. I was in the worst pain of my life and then suddenly this slimy baby was lying on me.

MY BOY! Weighing 8lb 14oz.

Mr Knight was able to cut the umbilical cord and I had him for a few minutes before I had to go to theatre due to 3rd degree tearing. Told you he burst out!

An hour later we were reunited in the recovery room where he had his first feed and we were able to start spreading the good news. We soon got settled into a hospital ward, I was in a lot of pain and was feeling very poorly as I’d lost over a litre of blood so we weren’t going anywhere!

We stayed in hospital for another day. I had to have a catheter in for 24 hours as I’d had a spinal block in theatre and I didn’t have the strength to walk due to the blood loss. I was also full of grazes and black with bruising so I needed to be where all the painkillers were!

The next day we were allowed home, armed with a bag full of drugs, at about 3pm. I was so excited to see Little Knight as it’s the longest we’ve ever been apart, and never overnight. She was so excited to meet her baby brother! Her face lit up when she saw us and she was full of cuddles and kisses for him. We’re so proud of her.

It’s now a week later and we are just enjoying day to day life as a family of four. I’m starting to feel like myself again already and recovery is going well, stitches are looking good and my bruising is going down now. I feel like an actual hero that I managed to labour and give birth with minimal pain relief and without any intervention. I was so keen to have a VBAC (Vaginal Birth After Caesarean) but I don’t think I really believed that I was actually strong enough to do it. Now I feel like I could do anything!

He is perfect. He’s feeding beautifully and managed to put on an ounce in his first week. I could just stare at his gorgeous face all day.

We purposely haven’t had any visitors apart from immediate family for the first week as I felt so overwhelmed last time and I enjoy being in our little newborn bubble.

As you can imagine things are a little busier these days so my posts might be few and far between for a while. Thanks so much for reading.

Knight Mummy x


For the new big sister.

The biggest difference between this pregnancy and my last one is that I have a whole other person to take into account now. Our little girl is about to transition into a role that she didn’t ask for and doesn’t yet understand so we’re trying to make this as smooth and happy a process as possible. The baby will be content as long as he/she has constant milk and cuddles so Little Knight and her emotions are our priority at the moment.

She’s got a few age appropriate books about becoming a big sister which she really enjoys reading and she will kiss my belly and say ‘bebe’ so she has a vague understanding about the whole concept. But to be honest how can you really prepare a 2 year old for such a big change? I don’t think the husband and I are completely prepared!

I’ve prepared a special basket of treats that she will get when she first meets the baby as I really want to make a fuss about her being a big sister and how special she is.

Her basket contains:

  • A new reading book. I chose Supertato as she already has the first story in this series and really loves it.
  • Sticker book. She had the reading book of the same story so she knows it well. This is a read a long book where she has to fit the stickers into the story. She loves stickers and I thought it’d be a nice activity to do together.
  • Personalised card. I ordered it off eBay and it was very inexpensive with her name on. She obviously can’t read but I thought it’d be nice to keep.
  • Peppa Pig jumper. She actually chose this herself about 2 months ago and I put it away so she’s forgotten about it.
  • Twirlywoos figures. These were the most expensive part of the basket. She is really enjoying small figures at the moment and finds all of the Twirlywoos characters very funny. As they are little they’ll be perfect for putting in her little backpack when we go out and I know she’ll be really excited about them.
  • The basket itself was from eBay and it can be used in her bedroom afterwards.

We’ve obviously not long had Christmas so nothing is particularly extravagant but I know she’ll be really happy to have each thing. I haven’t wrapped anything as I think the whole situation will be a bit overwhelming anyway so I don’t feel like a big basket of presents will help. She can have fun opening the baby’s presents when we have visitors.

Little Knight will be staying with my parents whilst we’re having the baby so Mr Knight will collect her from there and bring her to us so it’ll just be the 4 of us. We’ll then have family and other visitors when we’ve had some time alone.

I’m so so excited but also a little apprehensive about everything but I think that’s natural when it’s such a big deal! I wrote a post about how I felt about having a second baby (which is here if you missed it) and I just think that you can’t help but feel guilty about everything when you’re a parent sometimes!

Please let me know if you did anything like this or your stories of new siblings. Hopefully it won’t be long until Baby Knight is here now!

Thanks for reading,

Knight Mummy x


The hospital bag.

I’m currently 37 weeks pregnant and thought it was about time I sorted out my bag for the hospital. (I’m sure I had it packed at about 32 weeks with Little Knight!) I’m just taking a little pull along hand luggage case which I’m sure I used last time. The wheels meant I could pull the case along comfortably when we left the hospital so Mr Knight could carry the baby.

If you think I’m missing something or have any other ideas then PLEASE let me know!

Firstly, stuff for me:

  • Breast pads. I obviously won’t take all 80, my milk probably won’t come in whilst I’m in hospital anyway but they made me feel much more comfortable last time.
  • Maternity pads.
  • Magicool spray. I found Mr Knight spraying me in the face really refreshing during the intense part of labour.
  • Huge, dark pants. The sort that come up really high incase I need another caesarean.
  • Nursing bra.
  • Nursing vest top.
  •  Maternity nightie. I wore this last time and it’s perfect for hospital, the button down front makes breastfeeding easy too.
  • A large, dark towel.
  • Tangle teezer, hair band and hair clip.
  • Face wipes. I bought all of my toiletries from the holiday miniatures section so this pack only contains 7 wipes which is perfect as I never use them in everyday life.
  • Toothbrush and toothpaste.
  • Deodorant.
  • Lip balm. The gas and air really dried my mouth out last time.
  • Moisturisor.
  • Make up. If I don’t want to use them, that’s obviously fine but I think it’s nice to have the option. I just packed a mini mascara, a concealer and a BB cream.
  • A large mirror.
  • Instax Polaroid camera. To capture those first magic moments!
  • A nice pair of pjs. My lovely mama bought me these and made sure they were dark in colour and had a button down top for breastfeeding. I just think you feel so vile post birth that you want to have something nice to wear.
  • Slippers.

I’ll also throw in some of the big bottles of Lucozade Sport. I had them last time and they helped keep my energy up, they come in a sports cap so I could drink whilst lying down  and I kept being sick when I drank water as I had an empty stomach.

Stuff for the baby:

  • Nappies.
  • Cotton wool. I like to use the pads for nappy changes and the balls for everything else.
  • Lasinoh nipple cream. This should probably be in with my stuff but essential regardless.
  • 3x large Muslin cloths.
  • 2x wrap vests. I love these as you don’t have to pull them over the baby’s head and they just Velcro shut.
  • 2x long sleeved vests. These are for leaving hospital as it’ll be FREEZING. Poor baba!
  • 4x sleepsuits. 2 in newborn size and 2 in 0-3 months. Just incase they are right and the baby is huge! (The duck one was the first outfit Little Knight ever wore so I’m hoping it fits!)
  • A hat.
  • A blanket.
  • A thick ‘coat’ sleepsuit. 

We don’t know what gender the baby is so everything is white, grey and mint coloured.

I’ll also put a clean t shirt and snacks in for Mr Knight since he might be there for the long haul! There are also last minute things to put in, like my hospital notes and phone chargers but obviously I’ll need those beforehand.

And of course the car seat will be in the car ready!

I’ve also packed a bag for Little Knight to take to Nanny and Grandpa’s with plenty of pjs, clothes, nappies etc etc. They have plenty of toys and books there so she doesn’t need very much.

I hope this is a bit useful if you’re about to pack your bag or know someone who is. Again, please let me know if you can think of anything else that I might need.

Thanks for reading,

Knight Mummy x


In the thirties! Pregnancy update.

I’m currently 34 weeks pregnant and thought I’d just do a little update. I’ve not been posting much lately (not that I think people will have noticed!) as I’ve hit that pregnancy tiredness again and the little energy I do have is being used up by my toddler, which I wouldn’t have any other way!

I mentioned in a previous post (here) that I was having another scan to check that my placenta hadn’t attached to my caesarean scar. I had that last week and it was amazing how much of the baby you could see. It has hair that was floating around in the fluid! Good news is the baby is looking healthy and my placenta has behaved itself and moved out of the way of my scar and the baby’s head. Very pleased! However the baby was measuring quite big so my consultant sent me for a gestational diabetes test but that came back clear. Thank goodness! That would’ve rained on my Christmas! I’ve got to go back for another scan in a couple of weeks and then hopefully my consultant will agree to us being on team VBAC. So far so good.

So Baby Knight II is cooking up a treat and will be a little chunk by the sounds of it. Big sister was never a tiny baby though and she never lost any of her 8lb 8oz birth weight so it wasn’t much of a surprise. I get some CRAZY big kicks and wriggles, my stomach is constantly moving around and my belly button has popped out already!

In terms of me, I have SPD now which makes things a bit difficult but I’m just powering through! I was offered physiotherapy but once Christmas is out the way I won’t have long left so I declined. It feels like more hassle than it’s worth especially with Little Knight. It’s not all the time but when it does strike I can be in quite a lot of pain. Only a few weeks to the finish line now though!

Other than that, heartburn has been completely vile and I cannot wait to eat and not think about it once the baby has arrived. I could write a whole post about how much I appreciate Gaviscon.

We finally sorted out the dreaded spare room of doom and now Little Knight has moved in to her new big girl bedroom, which she loves! Her old room will go back to being a nursery again and just needs her toddler bed converted back into a cot. It’s on the husbands to do list! He has a week off over Christmas so we’ll try and get a bit more organised then…or we’ll just spend the week lying around watching Peppa Pig and finishing off the chocolate.

Thanks for reading,

Knight Mummy x


No longer the only one.

I am so happy to be expecting again and I cannot wait to add to our little family. Siblings have such a special relationship and we’re so blessed that we’re able to give that to Little Knight. She will really love being a big sister. She is such a kind and gentle little girl and I am beyond excited to see her with our own baby.

However, the whole point in this blog is that it is an outlet where I can be completely honest and as excited as I am, I can’t help but feel a tinge of sadness for my girl. My beautiful first born. The darling who made me a mama in the first place! Everything has been about her for so long and I feel sad for her that things are going to change so much. She’s not a spoilt child in terms of stuff (though she definitely doesn’t go without) but she is with attention!

She’s going to have to share me and I feel so sad thinking about her wanting me to do something and she might have to wait. I know a lot of people will say it’s good for her to learn all this and blah blah blah but she’s still so very little.

I feel almost selfish for wanting another baby and putting her in this position. In her world, everything is lovely how it is and we’re going to change everything. In my logical mind, I know she’ll love having a sibling but that doesn’t stop me feeling guilty about making her adapt to this. Being pregnant is hard work, I can’t run after her like before and climb around soft play and she doesn’t understand why.

We have ‘big sister’ books and we talk about the baby a lot and she’ll kiss my tummy but she’s still so young and I know she doesn’t really understand what’s going to happen. We’ll just drop her off at Nanny and Grandpa’s with no idea when we’ll pick her up. She’ll have the best time there but I will miss her so much.

When she does see me again EVERYTHING WILL BE DIFFERENT. This new baby will be here and needing so much from me and from then I won’t just be her mama. I’ll be two little people’s mama.

When the baby is born and people come to visit I worry that she won’t get any attention. The little baby won’t have a clue but my big girl will and I can’t bare the thought of her feeling left out.

I know the hormones aren’t helping. I’ve said ‘sad’ like 16 times but I can’t help it. It’s the only word that seems to fit!

Please let me know if you feel or felt the same and that I’m not the only one! Obviously we are all really excited to have this baby and I’m so happy to be pregnant! It’s just the combination of crazy hormones and the dreaded mum guilt. In reality, I’m confident that my girl will thrive and really love being a big sister. She’ll have a best friend for life. I’m sure they’ll enjoy moaning together about how annoying and embarrassing their parents are!

Thanks for reading,

Knight Mummy X